Mothers day has come and gone. I was meeting my mom and some others to visit my brother yesterday, my first time since his passing. It was absolutely surreal. As I drove up to park my car, my mom was standing there alone wheeping over his grave. The sky was overcast, the wind was howling, and these big beautiful trees in the distance behind her were rustling with life. It was a moment I will never forget. I was overcome with sadness. I miss so many things about him that I never gave thought to when he was with us. We all hung out with Blake for about a half hour. It was quite peaceful. No suffering, no pain. Just peace. His presence was no doubt felt by us all. Mothers Day, Fathers Day, no holiday will ever be the same. But I am glad I got to spend some time with Blake, and remember...
Love Steven
3 comments:
My heart aches for your mother's pain . . .
It is exactly 1 year to the day that I learned something was wrong with Blake. That pain never fades, just gets dulled by the distration of everyday life. Something often happens to bring it right back.
As I stood at Blake's grave the other day I thought how fortunate he is that he does not have to live with this pain and that he is resting and at peace while we endure his the loss of his life. Nothing seems fair. To cope I found myself looking at other graves just to find people as young or younger than him that were also in that sacred ground.
Blake you are missed no less as time passes.
Laurie
Steve, I know just what you mean about surreal. When I think about how this time last year we were making plans about how to deal with his illness and treatment options and how he was still so vibrant and funny and beautiful and full of life, it's hard to believe that he's really not with us anymore. Sometimes it seems like this is all a dream and I'll wake up and he'll be in bed next to me where he belongs. Just remember that we have each other and that Blake is with us all the time. He's fine, he's healthy, he's whole. We'll love him forever.
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